Week 16: 17-23 April – Words
Maybe the hardest thing a person can face in a lifetime; self-love.
If you ask people around you “Do you love yourself“, some of them will perceive this question in a negative way. Because for them, loving yourself equals to selfishness.
Some of them will look confused because it’s a question they have never given a thought to.
Some people will say that they love themselves for sure, without knowing what self-love is. Because unlike what they think, self-love isn’t enjoying your life, enjoying your job, physically looking your best, doing whatever you want. It doesn’t base on your circumstances or the things you can or can’t do. It’s a long and endless journey, for me. But once you are in that path, you learn to enjoy every second of your life, trust me because I know.
It’s not a pretty and fun path. You genuinely suffer. It has a lot of steps to go through; a lot of personal shit to solve, to be honest. From your childhood traumas to core beliefs. Every single thing you know that shaped you to be the person you are today. And every single feeling that they bring and hang on to you till today. You need to face them all, one by one. And throughout this confrontations, you learn self-awareness, self-control, self-care, self-empathy, self forgiveness, self-acceptance. You learn your SELF. You discover the real you. And if you truly can discover and love that “real you”, it’s self-love.
Simply it’s a choice. Because it’s too much work, some people surrender their emotionally made self-judged opinions, sweep things under the carpet because they don’t want to go deeper and confront. They continue to live by saying “I’ve always been like this, this has always been like that“, “I’m like that, I can’t help it“, “my father was like this“, “it was my mother’s fault” etc. A life on impulse.
To be honest, it’s not the healthies way but it’s a secure way to survive. No one dies from not truly knowing what self-love is. That was what I had been doing for all those years. But leading to this path made me a whole new person. When I learned to figure out the things I did and why I did them, understand my choices and process my emotions without judging myself, the world has changed for me forever and for all the people around me. Now that I can say the one person I love and care the most in this life is me. I love me. Actually I’m crazy about me :). I’m not saying this in an egotistic, arrogant, narcissistic way, believe me. But I really love who I’ve become and I’m my best friend. You may not believe it but it made me understand people more and love them unconditionally.
If I was able to give only one advice to mandkind it would be;
It’s the remedy, it’s the recovery, it’s the key, it’s home, it’s everything.